|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Recently someone asked me, "What coaching tools do you use?"
"Tools?" I asked, bewildered. "I avoid tests and assessments."
"No," she explained. "Listening skills?"
Well, I suppose I listen -- but I mostly listen to my own intuition. And I encourage clients to do the same.
Since I derive most of my life lessons from reading murder mysteries, I am reminded of a recent book by Marcia Muller: Listen to the silence. The heroine, Sharon McCone, turns her prodigious investigative talent to researching her own background. As she interviews family members, her significant other, also a heavy-duty detective, says, "Listen to the silence."
He meant, "When someone answers a question, don't just listen to what's said. Listen for the pauses, the silences in what they say."
As I listen to clients, I've decided that we need to listen to the messages sent by our bodies, our friends and family, and what some would call "the universe" -- our environment. As business people, we need to listen to our customers. We need to listen with great skepticism to advice.
While this idea may seem a little woo-wooish, here's an example. One day I received an email from a web designer who had landed on my website.
"You need help, desperately," she said. "Everything's wrong!"
Something didn't feel right about the message. Intuition works with knowledge, and I've learned to be skeptical of unsolicited guidance or advice. "You get what you pay for" tends to be all too true. So I thanked her politely and continued with business as usual. And I listened to clients who weren't web designers but who did like the site.
One day I applied for an affiliate program with a noted web designer -- someone who's often chosen to serve as a judge for web awards and contests.
"Interesting site," she said.
"Gee," I said, "everybody loves my site except designers and marketers."
"Ignore them," she said. "Your site's just fine. I should know."
This validation (vindication?) is rare, but reminded me that the best support systems encourage us to listen to our own world -- not their words. If you're researching a new career, and you get only negative messages, you need to pay attention.
Considering a move to a new location and find yourself feeling like, "I don't belong here?" Going to a big job interview and feeling that everything you say is coming out all wrong? Well, there's a reason.
There are times to heed well-meaning, unsolicited advice. When Tony Soprano says, "This game isn't for you," pay attention. When the police officer says, "Slow it down," that's a good idea too. But most of the time, listen for subtle messages from whatever crosses your path.
That's your own intuitive code. And don't let any words get in the way of the real message.
Learn to crack your own intuitive code.
For help with your next move, download Making the Big Move.
About The Author
Cathy Goodwin, Ph.D., is an author, speaker and career/business consultant, helping midlife professionals take their First step to a Second Career. http://www.cathygoodwin.com.
"Ten secrets of mastering a major life change" mailto:subscribe@cathygoodwin.com
Contact: cathy@cathygoodwin.com 505-534-4294
A man is captive within himself. He dwells in a... Read More
See if this scenario sounds familiar. You're under a lot... Read More
You probably know a few. These gals marry the millionaire.... Read More
What you need to understand is that there is no... Read More
The world we are living in is changing at a... Read More
Millions of people become anxious and insecure when speaking in... Read More
The pupils of the eyes will dilate (enlarge) up to... Read More
It's time for that annual ritual of making (and breaking)... Read More
As we age and our teeth shift, a gap between... Read More
Over time, the TIP's Letters that receive the most response... Read More
Do you believe in the idea of "abundance" or do... Read More
First principle: You and the universe is one.In order to... Read More
We have all heard the expression, "if at first you... Read More
Would you rather be wealthy or poverty-stricken? Not a difficult... Read More
If you could change one thing in your life today,... Read More
Once one becomes present to his or her self-limiting belief,... Read More
I was working with this guy who wanted to live... Read More
In earlier articles, I've often spoken about the supreme importance... Read More
It is important to have your own values, beliefs and... Read More
What I am about to tell you will take a... Read More
A lot of your people problems and concerns about what... Read More
To create true, lasting prosperity, almost any guru can tell... Read More
Wildflowers grow from mere dust to reach their full potential.Wildflowers... Read More
Someone recently asked me the question: "How can I have... Read More
Christmas is all around us, and many people are making... Read More
Imagine that each person on this planet carried with them... Read More
1. Emotion: We are emotional creatures and as in all... Read More
Before I explain why a minute of Deliberate Attraction is... Read More
It's time for the "mainstream" to WAKE UP. The alarm... Read More
In part 1 of this series, we discussed your Total... Read More
The Concept of Beauty"Mirror Mirror on the Wall, who's the... Read More
Our feelings are perceived by means of our sensors, our... Read More
"You cannot step into the same river twice"Hericlitus spoke those... Read More
If you read personal growth or self-help books at all,... Read More
Recently a friend of mine was talking about all the... Read More
Using affirmations can be a very powerful tool. You can... Read More
Whilst everyone seems hell bent on becoming "wealthy" at all... Read More
Have you ever been really sure about something, only to... Read More
This is the sixth article in our "True Power" series.... Read More
The joy of living is in loving. No doubt, only... Read More
Attraction Attraction |
Zeytin | News - Magazine | Cinema - Video |